I've been doing okay with my "change of focus" and practice to improve my serving attitude. How have you been doing? I admit I have messed up. I caught myself grumbling during laundry time (do I really have to be thankful and loving towards my husband's million white t-shirts that I have to fold??) and during diaper changes. But the good thing is that I caught myself! I count that as progress.
Anyway, I want to take this love practice a step further. I want to find ways to go the extra mile in serving my family. I've been trying to think of ways to do this and have been having a hard time coming up with a lot of examples, so it might be something I have to look for as I'm doing things and as I go about my daily life. One thing I thought of is to do tasks ordinarily done by my husband, like taking out the trash. This will be in service out of love for him. The key to this too is to do it with a loving attitude and without expectation of thanks or praise in return. The extra mile with my kids might include things like cutting their sandwiches into fun shapes that they like, or saying yes to that picnic in the living room that they like so much on cold winter days.
Try doing this with me! Let me know your ideas and how you do with your own practicing!
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This morning I got up before my husband and made him breakfast. Nothing fancy, but this is something that I never do. And I know that he would 'prefer' me to do this for him (as a good wife should, right?). So I get up, make it, wake him with the breakfast in hand. Is he thankful? I'm not sure. This just happened to be one in a few mornings that he was able to sleep in but didn't get to because I woke him. So I didn't get the thank you and big hug that I was expecting. Will I do it again? Absolutely. Will I ask him the night before what time he is getting up? Most definetely. I think I'm okay without the thanks from Mark because I didn't do it for that reason. I did this to serve him, love him, and show love to him. God is doing a great and amazing thing; He is changing me and I kinda like it.
ReplyDeleteHas anyone read The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman? It will help you figure out your spouses love language and help you to speak it. If your husband's love language is Acts of Service then I'm sure he will greatly appreciate and respond to this. But maybe it is Words of Affirmation, Touch, Gifts, etc. You tend to give love to your spouse how you want/receive it, so you may be able to figure it out by what your husband does for you. Hopefully this makes sense.
ReplyDeleteJeff and I play this little game of "who can out serve the other". We each try to do little things for each other before they have to do it themselves. i.e. I take two vitamin chewies every morning and night. Jeff will not only get them out for me, but he will unwrap them for me. Usually I am awake before him, so I try to have a cup of coffee ready for him as soon as he gets up. Sometimes it takes effort to think about and anticipate what his needs or wants are and then fulfill it before he does. There are so many little things that he does for me, too. I agree about the Five Love Languages. We read it together and it helped us to understand those needs about each other.
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